Ended up lazing around...

I woke up in the morning feeling... good. Surprisingly good. As i normally feel...not so good in the morning.
I woke up and thought that it would be a busy day but ended up that i'm really free.
So, initially my plan for today was, wake up and study, then go for Taylor's registration, rush back in time for jazz classes, then church in the evening.
but ended up eating breakfast in front of the computer, then flipped through magazines. then when i noticed the time, it was time to go out ady.
And my uncle asked so many questions at the registration so by the time i reached molek, it was alr 2.40pm.
so no point going for jazz anyway... went home and rmbed mummy was going to a wedding dinner with Thaniel.
That means no mass for today.
then i asked my mum what would i have for dinner since she wont be in and Nigel is out.
She then asked me to follow her to the dinner. I really dont want to go, but it's either i go, or no dinner.
so... no choice but to go!
Since i'm so lazy today, i cant even think of what to wear....
later i'll just stand in front of my closet and simply pick something out.


I have been lazy to blog lately... I have some stuff to blog about but just...plain lazy.
So... it just hit me recently that I will be in college next year.
Not that i never knew i would be in college but it just always seemed so far away until recently.
And i think i've made the right choice not to worry about it earlier, becoz worrying never helps, thinking a lot doesnt help either.
I just knew that somehow all things would work out.
maybe not as i planned or not what i always wanted,and maybe it would never be as i wanted it to be, but at least it worked out well.  I consider myself lucky i guess.
And to those that are still lost like how i was before or anyone that are going through a hard time, all that i can say is to take it step by step. somehow and someday things will work out.
Like i said, it may not always be what you planned it to be or what you always wanted but just dont lose hope, becoz you wont be able to move on without hope.
I have to have hope in the things i want to do but cant, in the dreams i want to fulfill but cant, bcoz i know i'm still young, and still need to listen to what elders say and follow directions. I just dont have the full right to make my own decisions yet, there's still so much to consider besides myself. not like *cough* someone *cough* at home that only thinks about himself!
but who knows? mayb things will turn out better than i wanted them to be. unexpected things bring unexpected results. and most importantly, dont have too high expectations. one of the principles of my life.
and i just got lectured and nagged by my uncle the other day, I may not like or even hate whatever he said, but they are all the truth i've been avoiding to face.
I'm the best at avoiding stuff. Even the smallest stuff like veggies.


needing to move out of home and live on my own without my mum and uncle around will be scary.
but i'm most grateful that i wont need to do it all alone as unnie will be there with me~
bcoz to be honest, when i'm alone and it gets too scary i'll seriously cry out, even if it's in front of a lot of ppl.
it's not gonna be easy next year, barely thinking of it alr makes me want to lock myself in my room and never come out.
but it's the the process of growing up and i need to face it all. i know it's gonna be hard in the beginning, but i hope i'll get used to it soon.
i'm the type of person that gets used to a new enviroment quite easily and i dont think i get homesick easily so i'll be fine.
the only thing i'm scared of is my studies. I normally need to be alone in my room in order to really concentrate and study, everything will be different next year. I hope i'll do well. I must!



i guess that's all with my rant.
wont be able to blog much in the near future.
not many days left before SPM. T_T
have to get pass this obstacle before i can start thinking of others. step and step.
I alr cant wait for the holidays~ >__<