:(

I'm actually supposed to be at a rosary prayer session with my mum at a friend's house but....
it all started when my mum came home and we were having dinner and she told me she was going for rosary and i told i didnt want to go coz i alr had planned things to do.
and she didnt say anything, so i thought she was okay with it.
and then I told Thaniel to go with her, so that she wont be alone, but stupid Thaniel always want to follow Nigel.
and Nigel was going for a friend's father's funeral.
then minutes before they left, my mum asked why i wasnt getting ready, i was like, I'm not going.
my mum was like, No, you're coming along.
I was like, URGH! WHY?! I have plans. and why cant Thaniel follow her? i've been going with her for so many times ady.
I was in a bad mood, not the time to get on my nerves.
i planned to just ignore her and continue using the com, then a part of me said that i should be a good girl and follow.
so i got up and went into my room, i lied on my bad thinking of whether to go.
in the end, i decided to go but very unwillingly.
i didnt talk to anyone or look at anyone and just got into the car. Nigel driving, coz he just had to go for the funeral, so he just had to dropped us off.
then when we reached the auntie's house, i just didnt feel like going anymore.
my mum got down and i stayed in the car.
Mum: Come on, let's go.
Me: I dont want to go.
Mum: What?!
Me: I dont want to go.
My mum waited and got frustrated and just closed the car door and i stayed inside.
Nigel: Then where do you want to go now?
Me: Home.
so he drove me home. and once i got into my room, i regreted acting like a 10 year-old kid.
I was just thinking this afternoon that i should appreciate everything i have in my life especially my family.
but then now i'm like this. T_T But it's that time of the month when i get very emotional... so i cant really control my emotions well. but somehow, it's just an excuse.
i feel so bad right now that i'm gonna punish myself later.



i wanted to blog about how so many ppl are going through so much in their lives and i'm having such a good life, and am still not satisfied with it.
i need to change. and most importantly treat everyone nice, becoz everyone is going through a hard time too.
you may not know it, coz ppl always hide their feeling, i understand becoz i do it all the time.
i seem like a cheerful person, i dont write have emo statuses on fb, i dont tweet about being in a bad mood and i seldom blog about it either, but it doesnt mean i dont go through it.
i just choose a different way to express it sometimes.
but i'm glad i am born a person and dont fret about bad stuff for long, normally i forget about them the next day.
it's just that, i see so many ppl around me going through such a hard time... and it makes me realize how fortunate i am, and i hope everyone seeing this will too.
and it's not that i never realized how fortunate i am, i've always known, but i never put action to it.







my mum just came back, and greeted me happily.
i guess i need go and treat her better now. gtg~